Monday, August 31, 2009

Manic Monday: Moving Day!

I have had the craziest August.

This weekend, I spent all my free time packing and moving my stuff back into my parent's house. Thank god they're alive and will let me move back in with them Otherwise, I'd be on the street (and without health insurance).

While I am still very angry about how the whole situation went down (out of personal respect for my former roommates, I'll leave out the gory details, but it was NOT a good situation), I am actually OK (so far) with the prospect of living with my parents and driving an hour each way to get to school. Benifit: I get to live in my favorite city, Springfield, MO. I LOVE YOU SPRINGFIELD. It contains people and places I love and I will never be bored while living at home. My parents are so entertaining, and I have done a decent job of keeping up with people since I left for college, so I still have many friends and acquaintances there.

I never really enjoyed Joplin, but I stayed because I fell in love with the school. I don't know what it is about Missouri Southern. It is a smallish, D-2 school. I like it because the teachers have been wonderful. I feel like many of my teachers deserve bigger schools with bigger salaries and bigger research gigs. I get the benefits of going to a state four-year university (and the state school with the cheapest tuition in Missouri!) but the small class sizes of a small school. No 500 student general psych classes for me! (Well, my general psych class was online, so it didn't really matter, but I digress.)

What I'm saying here is, this weekend has been a blur. I actually haven't showered. (EW, TMI!) Yesterday, my blood glucose spent the whole day in the uppper 200's to 300's, except once around dinner when it crashed to 50, and then I way (way) over corrected and wound up at 394. OUCH!

I guess I've learned that when other things are stressing you out, you can't let the BG's stress you out on top of it all. It's just not worth it. I'll accept my morning reading of 196. Funny, that's lower than most mornings.

Saturday, August 29, 2009

Day to Night

I'm becoming a weekend blogger. I guess it's because I'm busy during the week now. I hope that once I get moved in at home and D (the boyfran) gets moved in at HIS school (4 hours away, gotta love those LDR's!), I'll settle into a schedule and can fit a weekday blog post in. If not, I'll stick to weekend blogging. It's cool to be different anyway.

So, for the past few months I have been "trying" to get my diabetes under control. Let's face it, I was just tired of feeling so sick all of the time!

Lately this is how the conversation between my brain and blood sugar has gone:

9AM

Body: Holy crap, I gotta pee. I have a headache and my muscles are all stiff. I must be high. What did I eat last night? *checks log* nothing after 7? and my bedtime number was 114? this is weird...

BG: yeah, well. i enjoy hanging out up here in the mornings, it's been a new past time of mine.


Body:
Well quite frankly I don't appreciate it. It makes it harder to get up in the morning and leaves me feeling groggy. Please stop!

11am

Body: Why am I still high? I took six units of insulin!

BG: I am immune to your insulin powers! I am having a blast on the top of this ferris wheel. please just leave me alone! I enjoy tormenting your kidneys and sending you to the bathroom every ten minutes!

Body: Blargh

1pm

Body: Hey, BG, you're finally deciding to cooperate even though I ate far more carbs than I should have at lunch. Why the change of heart?

BG: oh I don't know, I was beginning to be afraid of heights. I decided to hang out down here for a while.

Body: well, ok, just please don't fall too far. I'd like to be functional this afternoon.


3pm

Body: I'm awful hungry. I think I'll have some applesauce or a granola bar.

BG: Probably a good idea, i'm feeling a little short of glucose. ¡Damelo!

5pm
Body: can't breathe, can't think, can't move.

BG: neither can i, what happened to that sugar you ate?


From there, it's a crap shoot. I'm either great for the rest of the evening and go to bed at 100, or I'm high til about 2 hours after dinner and then I once again go to bed at 100 (Usually, a work out happens after dinner). I think a work out might fix the morning highs if I got up and got one in early, BUT, that doesn't fix them happening in the middle of the night.

*sigh* Just another reason why I need a CGM and/or a pump. I'm NOT looking forward to fighting the insurance company this coming month. My most recent experience with them was, before I switched to mail order, calling them with readings far above what they should have been because my insurance was refused at the pharmacy. ($400? You've got to be kidding me! It's supposed to be $15! Followed by hours of no insulin). Dispite countless pleas from both my doctor and me to the insurance company to keep from switching to mail order, we finally gave in.

The fight for CGM and the pumpy will begin in t-minus 2 weeks. I want to be ready. Advice?

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

My Very Own D-Challenge

Well faithful followers, here it is. My first dblog procrastination-post of my final semester of undergrad. The first of many, I am certain. I have lots of homework due tomorrow (yes, homework on the first day! How cruel, college professors!), but I am not doing it right now because I am blogging. Story of my life.

So I had a lapse this week. I really didn't feel like having diabetes for about 3 days, and so I stopped. I know everyone has these days, but I was doing so well! But today I am back on track, at least as far as testing and dosing goes. As far as good numbers and eating well and exercising goes, not so much. But with time, eh?

Here are my goals for the end of the semester:

School-wise:
  • Pass all classes with at least a 3.0
  • Don't get behind, especially in my online class
  • Work on homework for at least 2 hours a day
  • Take the GRE and get into graduate school
  • GRADUATE with my BA in History

D-wise:
  • Test at least five times a day
  • Talk to doc about CGM
  • Try to get on a pump - I am finally READY
  • Try to exercise 200 minutes a week
  • Make healthier food choices and HOPEFULLY naturally crave healthier choices and naturally eat less by the end (just in time for the holidays :-/)

THAT BEING SAID...

My D-challenge this week for myself is going to be TESTING.

TESTING D-CHALLENGE RULES
  • DO test at least every 2 HOURS A DAY
  • DO test overnight mid-sleep
  • DO record BG's, food stuffs, exercise, and stress levels
  • DO make a pretty graph for my own viewing pleasure
No, I won't test every 2 hours forever, at least I hope not. My doc only allows me 5 strips/day (which I'm going to ask to be upped) on my current prescription. Anything more wouldn't be covered under my amazing insurance plan. BUT. as I explained here, I am backed up on those darned little things. One of my goals is to get rid of them!

I just want to know my body. I want to know how things affect me, and how I can counter their effects, everything from stress to food to exercise. SO this week, the plan is to try different types of foodstuffs, be under a lot of stress (easy, I'm moving!), try different types of exercises, and figure out how these things affect my blood sugar. We will see how much I learn in a week!!

No woes this week - my woeful Wednesday is filled with non- D related things. Please be thinking of me as I pack up and move back in with my parents this week and prepare for a twice-a-week hour long commute to school. I am worried about this beyond belief, but I think once I get into it it will be easier.

Also, thank you for being patient as I learn this d-blog thing. Right now, it's a ramble ramble keep track of my own self kinda thing. I enjoy reading and participating in the community and hope to become a stronger member with time.

I still haven't learned how to end blogs....so for now...hasta luego.

Sunday, August 23, 2009

Test Strips....and things.

Test strips! We already know they get into everything. If you don't know they get into everything, follow me around for a day. Chances are you will find a trail of test strips behind me. My best friend gets so angry when she finds them at her house. I can't help it! I often leave the house with them sticking to my shoes. It's unavoidable.

But what I really wanted to write about is the great news I have regarding test strips. That is, I am actually using them! I have a backed up stash. Before I started using mail order scripts (BOO!) my dad would stock me up before I left for a trip, school, etc. I also got a large "three month" supply after my first large shipment of supplies from my mail-order company. I have boxes in my dresser drawers. Luckily they have a long shelf life and I try to find the ones that expire the quickest when opening new vials.

But, since I have started checking five to ten times a day, my supply is depleting. It is very exciting for me! I need to go home and count how many I have so I can update how many I have used. Someday I may actually have to order some! I'll be excited for that day.

My newly increased test strip usage has left me in a pickle this weekend. When I left Joplin on Thursday, I had the strips left in the in-use vial (probably 5-10) plus one more vial of 25. Now for four days, if I check 5 times a day, that is plenty. But I don't check five times a day, more like closer to the ten side. Needless to say, I'm stuck in Springfield until tomorrow afternoon with but one strip to my name.

I tried to get more, I really did! I went to the pharmacy to see if my prescription was still good. It wasn't, it expired in March. Not having 30 dollars to spare, I am stuck with one strip. One strip for approximately 14 more hours. When should I use this strip? When I wake up? Before lunch tomorrow? Save it in case I feel low at some point?

I'm not afraid of not testing, I'm afraid of the numbers that will result after this period of nontesting. I will get home, test, and it will probably be somewhere in the 250 to 300 range. I am not looking forward to that number. I wish I could correct it now, but I only have one strip.

Lesson Learned: Back up the back up. (You'd think I would know this by now, with all my forgetting...)

Lesson Learned: Get emergency pharmacy scripts.

Lesson Learned: Stop being so testing crazy. Do you really think your 210 will drop to 110 in 20 minutes? (NO).

Lesson learned: Stop blogging at 3am.

Tuesday, August 18, 2009

Woeful Wednesday: Frustration

This week I have been dealing with quite a few things. My internship ended on Monday, I"m getting ready for school, trying to have fun in my week off and also find an apartment (for four months?) and a job. Woo! It sounds like a lot to me.

I have also been checking my levels like crazy. I am trying to just get this diabetes thing under control. It has been out of my hands for so long! I Need to take the reins. I'm starting to think about things like heart disease and kidney failure and things that could crop up as soon as 15-20 years from now of I don't get my numbers down. And I have been doing pretty well with my follow through!

Here is the thing though - even with the hourly check, I am still having trouble with highs. And I'm really sick of these spikes! I have even tried cutting back on the carb intake and limiting it to 30 g a meal.

Here are some things I am thinking about doing in order to help. Please tell me your thoughts on these things!

1. CGM. I think that the knowledge of my blood sugar throughout the day (and esp at night) will help me figure out what to do. I want to read more on this when I have time so I'm informed when I ask my endo about it in September.

2. Pump Pump! I have thought about going on a pump for years! But I am nervous about the cost, among other things. Soon, I'll have to go off my parent's insurace (in less than 18 months IF I stay in school til then...wow I am nervous!) and I think maybe I should try to get one while they'll at least pay PART of it. (I'm on United, they're okay, they make me mail order supplies which I hate!)

3. I need to find a Registered Dietitian. The lady I saw who works in my Dr.'s office was an epic FAIL. She told me about carb counting (duh) and that if I wanted to lose 2 lbs a week, I needed to eat 1500 calories a day. That was the extent of my hour and a half appointment.


And Test! Test! Test! I was testing once a day, if that. I am now slowly working my way through my test trip backed-up supply! It makes me happy to see them disappear...

That's all for Woeful Wednesday. Catch you on the flip side!

Saturday, August 15, 2009

Health Care Reform Now - Sign Our Petition

Things I Miss

I recently commented on this blog by Amylia Grace on Diabetes Daily about the thing I miss most about the pre-diabetes years (there were only eleven).

"mixing grape soda with red kool aid and having the most amazing drink ever. That is what I'd do with a day off from diabetes. Drink grape soda, and mix some of it with red kool aid. "

I have been able to find diet Orange soda out the wazoo but when it comes to diet grape, it's nowhere to be found. It makes me sad. Grape is my favorite flavor. I don't know if I genuinely like the taste or if I just like it because it's purple. And why I mixed it with red kool-aid (strawberry, cherry, fruit punch, doesn't matter!) I'll never know what my eight year old brain was thinking. I also think once I split a grape and put it on the edge of a glass like a lemon. I really thought I was a culinary genius.

A list of things I miss:

1. Baked Potatoes - I used to eat them, but since I became Amylin deficient I can't anymore without going into my "high blood sugar coma" state where I sleep for 2 hours.
2. Cotton Candy and
3. Carmel Apples - I just went to the fair last week, couldn't eat hardly anything!
4. Deep dish pizza - see baked potato. I stick with thin crust now!
5. Bleached, white, bad for you pasta - occasionally I treat myself to chef boyardee ravioli or make my famous Alfredo pasta, but I can only eat a tiny bit since both the sauce (made from flour and milk) and the pasta make me in to "comastate"
6. Sweet Tea - didn't really drink this as a child, but since McAlister's became a frequent Sunday lunch venue, the sips I've had of others have made me jealous.
7. Regular maple syrup - for a while I used sugar free, but it tastes so watery and has a weird after taste - so now I just put butter and sometimes peanut butter on my pancakes (when I eat them)
8. Non callused fingers - oh how i miss the days of soft hands.
9. A mixture of minute rice, milk, butter, and sugar - I know, weird - this was something my mom and I used to enjoy together! Now I can enjoy it in small heaps of brown rice, but brown rice just doesn't taste the same in the sugary mixture as the white did
10. Halloween candy - I was diagnosed on November 6, 1998 - my bag of Halloween candy was given away to my two younger brothers. Painful! It still hurts! I now buy discount Halloween candy and give it away to the members of the MSSU History Club - and take one or two for myself - but they don't understand the significance!


What do you miss about your pre-diabetes days?

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

Woeful Wednesday: Complain Time

WOES FOR THE WEEK:

1. Monitor, quit having dying batteries! Update: last night I found the lost monitor, which I assumed was locked in my boyfriend's car. It wasn't. It was hiding between my bed frame and my mattress. I found it with my toes and tossed it on the floor, causing my roommate's dogs to go mad. I was so happy to have my One Touch Ultra 2 back! While I enjoy the look of the Ultra Mini, my backup, I don't necessarily enjoy its simplicity. I am one who likes to tag my readings. Plus I just feel more comfortable with the larger design - no idea why.

AT ANY RATE, I turned it on to follow up on my "mysterious" high reading this morning and it was DYING. The little battery symbol is on. I'M FLAT BROKE. I CAN'T AFFORD TO BUY NEW MONITOR BATTERIES. Geesh. Come on, people! I guess I'm stuck with the mini until I can get new batteries. At least I have the working lanceting device (what I like to call a "poker").



2. Sugars, what is up with your high morning numbers? OK so I shouldn't say that. I've been doing excellent with checking every hour while I'm at work (trying to see how things affect my blood sugar without splurging on one of those fancy continuous monitoring devices), once I get home I tend to forget about Mr. Diabetes and how he is affecting my life. I generally head straight to the kitchen (starving), eat (sometimes low carb, but more often than not a meal containing pasta or rice), and then take insulin without checking my levels. This spirals me into a post-high-carb comanap, (I realize I shouldn't use coma lightly when diabetes is involved, HOWEVER, when I am in my high blood sugar nap state, I am dead to the world). Pass out for two hours, wake up, take a shot (without checking), and proceed to gorge on whatever food is lying around my house. OOPS. Nighttime, tired, bored munchies. Get me every time.

SO, BRAIN, learn that you can't just have diabetes eight hours of the day!! WAKE UP, SARAHJANE.

So not so mysterious is the reason I was 386 when I got to work this morning. Oh, and that giant cookie I ate for breakfast when i had a perfectly good frozen omelet in my freezer....

Friday, August 7, 2009

The Case of the Forgotton Monitor

So yesterday i thought it would be a brilliant idea to put on fake nails. Ha. Horrible. Typing is next to impossible.

Anyway. A few days ago I decided to check my levels every hour in order to see where i was and how food affected my numbers. I was doing really well (mostly in the 90-110 range, yay!) and with the exception of forgetting in the evenings once I left work, I was keeping on schedule. That is, until I got to work yesterday and didn't have my monitor.

While on the subject, let me now take the time to say that my own worst enemy when it comes to diabetes is my own forgetfulness. Forget to take insulin, forget insulin, forget new needle for pen, forget to replenish test strips, forget to test, forget meter, forget emergency sugar, forget to eat. Absent mindedness, ADD, and diabetes don't mix well.

I went the whole day without it. A few months ago, when I less than cared about my health, this would have been no big deal. But now, it is. I should have gone home to get it, but it's about 30 minutes there and 30 minutes back. So I dealed. I made sure to eat my afternoon snack and read the labels on my pre packaged food carefully so i didn't overdose the insulin. And things turned out fine. Then I got home, and couldn't find the monitor. I'm 95% sure it's in my boyfriend's car. Problem being, he drove to Colorado yesterday.

So this morning, I went to stock up on supplies for my back up meter. The lancet shooter thingy is broken, so i stuck lots of lancets in for self poking (which I hate). I even tossed in an extra bottle of test strips. Guess what I forgot?

You're right. The meter.

So I'm guessing that when I get home tonight, my perfect numbers won't be so perfect.

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